Well I know what you’re thinking… whomever invented the title must be ignorant, racist, a carbohydrate, or just plain stupid. And you’re right! I do love carbs but the term “Cracker” here is more related to decoding, you know like that movie with Tom Hanks?
My name is @ForCarl (I know), @nd I will share my insights into technology with you, and while doing so take political, philosophical, economical, and cardinal jabs at our beloved U.S.A.. So strap in, get ready for a treat. P.S. I don’t do that filter thing so if you’re sensitive, please 420 before proceeding, and reapply that medicine during as needed.
Technology is freakin amazing. I went from playing Warcraft I on Windows ’95 to playing Clash of Clans (COC is amazing). And that’s just the tip of it, but seriously all jokes aside technology is deep. It’s such a broad word, for me technology means computers, but really it could be a crutch or a cane. I believe a computer is the ultimate technology because of its intricate tie with mathematics. The computing power of the machine trumps a cane so here we are.
What OS are you running bro? I got that dual boot Arch Linux with Windows 7 partition. For get about running that MS Visual Studio pop that PHP and get dirty with jQuery. That’s right I like to write programs, unlike the wealth distribution in U.S. go fuck yourself A, in the programming world there is a vast open source community. Remember what your mama told you, if a programmer won’t help you for the sake of math, $he/he is headed straight to hell… and by that I mean getting a great job at a Fortune 500. I mean seriously how much do you have to suck to get a decent job in this country?
Clearly I’m getting off the point so I’ll put the yayo away and get back to technology. Listen, here is the deal.. if you’re using a Mac computer it’s probably not for the Linux backbone but you may be aware of it and use it as an excuse or to explain why Steve Jobs isn’t in hell right now burning for screwing over Asian workers to build computers for Americans to make them dumber and less knowledgeable about the technology they are using.
Switch to linux, seriously it’s a free light weight OS that won’t automatically shut down your computer for updates and increases your knowledge of how computers work man, it gets you closer to the hardware bro. Stop being lazy stupid Americans hop on Linux try Kali Linux in particular.
Which brings me to my next topic, Barack Obama and Freedom of Information. Listen hack the planet bro, I mean Barack would agree he hacked his way into the presidency. I mean isn’t he, like all other presidents of recent note just a big fat
hack? I mean Bill Clinton was great because he got blow jobs and played the sax but everyone else is just a hack.
Freedom of Information, we have no names man, we are nameless. That’s why getting a handle is so important. I’email@example.com come at me bro I have 2 championships. But seriously, with all the information out there on the Internets and Wikipedia I feel it’s mostly the stuff that everyone knows can guess or its how to build something which is cool, but what about the secrets? Like the JFK assassination files the government should let those go, or the deal about tower 7. What about Osama Bin Laden’s body? What the Americans that make under $40K but yet still pay 22.5 percent to the IRS for taxes and on behalf of which the American Government has printed and borrowed trillions of dollars, those people aren’t allowed to see bin Laden”$ body because some Arabs would be pissed? Dude be real we are fools, the 99÷ of Americans out there are getting a raw deal, and it’s due to technology.
Just like my girls, technology goes both ways. It’s opium to the masses! People love Facebook and Farmville, but at the same time technology allows fox news and CNN to spew absolute garbage on the airwaves, we need to stop that immediately. Someone hack CNN for the next 40 years, set up a sick cron job to run indefinitely. That’s why pen testing is so important, we need this more than you know.
The truth is we are at the very beginning of our technological journey as humans. We are just stretching our legs, learning how to walk, drinking and suckling the tit of Cyber Godesses.
As an American, I feel entitled to get everything I want at no cost at all, kind of like when Bush shocked and awed Iraq and when the Government cut funding for NASA. And what I want from technology is the ability to fly and live forever. I’m serious! No wait I want a sex bot, wait I want two sex bots; Miley and Kim K. God bless this country.
— Written by Lee Rice